Simara James is a mother of two, mindfulness coach and consultant, author, podcast host and flexible work expert looking to improve the lives of women across the globe by sharing tips to creating more balance and design a live that's full of fulfillment. 

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How to Meditate When You Can't Clear Your Mind

How an over thinker meditates by tricking her own mind into participating in meditation.

For years I've wanted to be one of those people who effortlessly meditates. I could clearly see that one of the common denominators of people who are successful is their ability to meditate whether in prayer form or transcendental form. But I am a thinker...my mind is constantly calculating and recalculating. I have never been more discouraged than when I spent an entire year trying to get into the habit of clearing my mind of all thoughts with no success and no consistency. Just the thought of meditation made me feel like a failure. Well, this year I decided to make meditation a top priority and change my mindset around it. I just one month, I've grown to love it and it's now a daily habit. Here's what worked for me.

1. Start Very, Very, Very Small

My intention this year was to meditate daily. I have two small children, a full time job, this blog, several other side businesses, and a very active social life. Dedicating the hour that most successful people do was just not an option for me starting off. I decided to commit to 2 minutes per day. Committing to such a short practice not only got me to a full week of consistent meditation increased my level of confidence in my ability to commit to the practice. It also took the pressure off and didn't give me time to get into a full fledged fight with my thoughts, which was the usual pattern. There simply wasn't enough time to mentally argue with myself. Just this one mental shift made meditating more enjoyable after the first week, I was easily up to 10 minutes of practice per day. Now I'm up to 15 and 20 minute sessions. Magical how that time I didn't have suddenly became available.

2. Call it Something Else

When I first started my practice again, I had to call it something that I didn't associate with failure. I chose the term Quiet Time. So I considered it just a time to appreciate the darkness (I did it before sunrise) and quiet for a few minutes. To savor it. This was so much easier for me to approach and was something I looked forward to.

3. Change the Objective

I used to believe that the ultimate objective of meditation was the quiet the mind. But now I understand that the quietness of mind is just a means to an end. The ULTIMATE goal of meditation is to connect with the Zero Point. The zero point is what some call source, and what my analytical brain has determined is the point were nothing and all possibilities exist at the same time. No ego exists. Your current identity floats away. You recognize that there is something inside of you that transcends anything your are experiencing in the 3D world. When the objective went from controlling something (my thoughts) to connecting with something (the potentiality of all things), I was more excited to engage.

4. Trick Your Thoughts into Redirecting

Following up on the previous point, intellectualizing the experience in a way that tricked my mind into relaxing instead of panicking was part of the process for me. It seemed counter-intuitive as the point of meditating was supposed to be to eliminate all thoughts, but as an over-thinker, I had to trick my thoughts into eliminating themselves. The following thoughts helped me to achieve it.I would allow only these thoughts to run wild as I sat in the quiet and they would help me get to a quieter place eventually.

-Darkness contains all possibilities. The color black is literally all possible colors combined. If I focus on the blackness when I close my eyes, I'm looking at the Zero Point. The point of all possibilities.

-The thoughts I'm viewing are all hand picked by my ego. As I watch them flow through my mind, I am observing myself from the zero point.

-It's ok for me to be overwhelmed with thoughts some days. I don't have to be perfect. The point of this experience is to enjoy imperfection as an expression of source.

Try these out and let me know if the Work-Life Balance Network Facebook Group if they work for you.

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